Out of ideas and looking for some best funny posts for Facebook, here you can find more than 50 best Facebook posts and funny status updates. We have collected these funny posts from the web on a single page for you so that you can bring a smile to your friend's face daily by posting these funny Facebook status updates.
People usually create their profiles on Facebook to interact with their friends and gets engage in random discussions with them so that the physical distance between them gets minimized and they can know more about each other. What can be the best way to start a conversation other than funny jokes for Facebook Posts.
Funny posts for Facebook status
If you think things can't get worse, it's probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
If at first, you don't succeed, destroy any evidence that you ever tried.
I wouldn't say you're stupid. You are, but I wouldn't say it.
Books have the knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay. So if you keep reading, you'll go broke.
Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
Why does life keep teaching me lessons I have no desire to learn?
Life's a bitch; if it were easy, it'd be a slut.
It may look like I'm doing nothing, but I'm actively waiting for my problems to go away.
Funny jokes for Facebook posts
Find the best funny jokes for your Facebook posts which will not only bring a smile to your friend's face but will also help to start a conversation that will increase your friendship and bring you closer to them. People say that your words show your personality same as when you do a public post on your Facebook profile it also represents your personality, so share these humorous and funny jokes on your Facebook posts and start interacting with your friends.
The greatest thing about Facebook is that you can quote something and totally make up the source. - Julius Caesar
I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies. Now I'm good at everything.
You know that feeling when the really cute girl walks by in the mall, and your smile, try to be smooth, and take a drink of tea, and run the straw up your nose?
My wallet is like an onion—when I open it, it makes me cry.
Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.
Facebook, suggested friends are the people I am trying to avoid intentionally.
Grammar is important. Commas save lives, as in this example: "Let's eat grandpa." vs "Let's eat, grandpa."
I am jealous of my parents. I can never have a kid as cool as theirs.
See also, 65 Romantic and Powerful Facebook Love Statuses for Girlfriend
Funny posts on Facebook to say
I have a busy day ahead: I have troubles to start, rumors to spread, and people to argue with.
Stop calling yourself hot; the only thing you turn on is the microwave!
I don't have exes; I have Y's. Y the hell did I do that?
Words can only hurt you if you try to read them. Don't play their game.
Money cannot buy happiness. It pays for the internet, which is the same thing.
This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! Now read without the word dog
I tried being normal once. Most boring hour of my life.
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Can I click on your picture? I love pictures of natural disasters.
If your relationship status says, "It's complicated," maybe you should stop kidding yourself and change it to "Single."
You didn't notice that I used a word twice in this sentence.
Funny posts for FB group
If you are in a Facebook group, you can share these funny posts which will start a conversation and interaction between FB group members. Share these funny posts in your FB group and let the group members respond with a comment and have some fun time. If not all the group members in your friend list, this will also help you make some new friends along the way. Leave your positive impressions in your Facebook groups with these funny posts and jokes.
Finding a job in this economy is like playing Where's Waldo? except that Waldo is looking for a job, too.
How long do you think it would take to solve a Rubik's cube if you were color blind?
Say the letter M without let your lips touch.
When a fly or small bug lands on your computer screen, has your first reaction ever been to try and scare it with the cursor?
A big shout-out to ATM fees for making me buy my own money!
It recently became apparent to me that the letters "T" and "G" are far too close together on a keyboard. This is why I'll never be ending an e-mail with the phrase "Regards" ever again.
Facebook has two types of people. The one who gets more likes, others are men.
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house earlier than Police do.
Birthdays are good for your health. Studies show those who have more Birthdays live longer.
Funny sayings for Facebook posts
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. - Abba Eban
Now, I'm going to do something I like to call the "compliment sandwich," where I say something good, talk about where you need improvement, and then end with something good. - Stewie Griffin, Family Guy
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced. - Frank Zappa
Can’t find your children? Try turning off the wifi. They appear suddenly.
The proper way to use a stress ball is to throw it at the last person to piss you off.
People, like prescription drugs, should have to list the side effects they’re likely to cause.
Related, 81 Best Facebook posts and status updates - Emotional, Funny, Sarcastic, Inspirational and Sad
Funny Friday posts for Facebook
If you are an employed person then Friday must be a most awaited day for you each week. Everyone waits for Friday as it brings a weekend and plenty of time to relax and gets prepared for the next working week. So celebrate each Friday by sharing these funny Friday posts for Facebook.
It's finally Friday! Felt like it took a week to get here!!
I hate it when the people who owe me money post about how much they are enjoying their Friday
Friday, I’ve tried to see other days and none compare to you, I love you.
In addition to Casual Friday, I propose the following: Punch A Coworker Monday, No Pants Tuesday, Drunk At Work Wednesday, and Call In Sick Thursday.
Thursday doesn't even count as a day, it's just the thing that's blocking Friday.
Friday, Yay the weekends here... BLINK Monday? WTF?
I don’t care if Monday’s blue Tuesdays gray and Wednesday too. Thursday I don’t care about you, It’s Friday I’m in love.
Has 32 friends online right now on a Friday night... You are all a bunch of losers... I am proud to be one of you...!
Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday so close to Monday?
Loves the smell of Friday in the morning, it smells like… WEEKEND.
If you're playing World of Warcraft on a Friday night & you put your ear up to your monitor, it sounds exactly like having no friends.
Funny stuff for Facebook wall posts
Behind every successful status, there is ctrl+C and ctrl+V
Balloons are so weird. "Happy birthday, here's a plastic sack of my breath."
Don’t break anyone’s heart; they have only one. Break their bones as they are 206
I hate it when someone turns the lights on while I'm asleep and I'm all like (o__-)
Save paper. Don’t do your homework.
People won't always love you. They may love what you bring to the table and love what you may do for them, but that doesn't mean they love you. Learn the difference, my friends.
Don’t steal. That’s the government’s job.
Does anyone else sit on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
Mosquitoes are like family as they suck blood.